This pregnancy has felt so different from my last two and I can't really figure out why. I guess it's just been lighter than the past two, but that's true of my life in general, so it all may just be circumstantial. Either way I am getting bigger by the day (or hour?) and finally felt the little squirt move. All day yesterday. Those flutters, kicks, and somersaults are what I live for during pregnancy. Each touch is another moment for us to connect before I can hold them in my arms and truly watch their personality come alive.
Both of my boys are so different. They have different passions and are often running in different directions. They both have the most beautiful souls and I can't wait to see the amazing men they'll turn into. They both have overflowing spirits, a trait that will take them far on whatever paths they choose.
So back to the baby. I had my 16 week appointment on Tuesday. All was well until the doctor couldn't get a good read on the baby's heartbeat because it was moving to much. She ordered an ultrasound so she could be confident in the heart rate and a mini internal anxiety attack ensued. Brent wasn't with me because third pregnancy, no concerns, no need. I've had a different doctor each pregnancy so I don't have much of a relationship with this one yet. I couldn't get a good read on how serious this was, if at all.
Turns out there was absolutely no reason to worry. Baby's heart rate was a healthy 145. As the tech and doctor entered the room they asked if I wanted to know gender even without Brent there. "Heck yes I do!" So I got to unofficially meet him, my third little boy, my newest son. My eyes teared up as she told me, as they have both times before. It's a strange and beautiful moment, finding out a little bit more about the person growing inside you. I cry at the first heartbeat, I cry at the gender reveal. But I don't cry when I meet them Earth side because by then we already know each other pretty well.
I'm a boy mom. And nothing has ever made more sense. I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.